


This Isn't Right

by TheMightyZan



Series: Nell and Cullen [6]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Abuse of a prisoner, Angst, F/M, dark themes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-05
Updated: 2015-03-05
Packaged: 2018-03-16 09:46:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3483653
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMightyZan/pseuds/TheMightyZan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The nightmare demon tries to break Nell Lavellan</p>
            </blockquote>





	This Isn't Right

**Author's Note:**

> General Warning: Abuse of a prisoner and related dark themes

She woke aching.

It took her a minute to open her eyes, the crust of dried tears sticking fast to her lashes, and when she did she was greeted with her wrists in shackles and the knowledge that she was aching because she was kneeling awkwardly on a stone floor.

She knew this place, this moment, it was when she had been a prisoner right after the Temple of Sacred Ashes had been destroyed.  The question was, what was she doing here now.

The door burst open before she could begin to formulate a reason and she jerked her head up to see a broad shape fill the backlit door.

 But that wasn’t right, it had been Cassandra and Leliana who had questioned her.  Giving a shake of her head, she focused back as he took a few steps into the room.  “Cullen, what-“  Her words were cut off when he lifted his arm back then swung it towards her, the back of his hand cracking against the side of her face and sending her tumbling to the side.

Her thoughts jumbled together and flew away as her head smacked into the stone floor and left her ears ringing.  Belatedly she realized he was talking to her when he stepped forward and nudged the point of his boot into her ribs.

“Did you hear me, mage?  If you speak again without permission I’ll gag you.”

This wasn’t right.  This wasn’t what happened.  It couldn’t be real, but when he took his foot away only to slam it against her side she let out a groan and nodded.

“Good.  I don’t know how you know my name, but you would do well not to use it again.  Now I want some answers.”

She flicked her tongue out over her bottom lip and brought back the tang of blood before rolling her head slightly to look up at him.  He looked the same, the same hair, the same face, the same armor, but the usual warm brandy of his eyes was flat and cold, and his mouth was twisted into a snarl, teeth bared and wrong.

This was wrong.

“What happened in the Temple?”

“I don’t know.”

He kicked her again then waited until she was able to glare back up at him.  “You’re lying.”

“I’m not.”  Her mouth hurt as she said the words and she braced herself for another kick but he surprised her by gripping a shackled arm and dragging her up till she was standing.

“Then explain this.”  He shook the shackles, his attention on the glow of her hand, and she stumbled with the movement.

“I can’t.”

He let go long enough to hit her once more across the face and then followed when the force hit her into the wall, his arm coming up to press across her chest and pin her there.  “Then what good are you to me?”  The words were low and menacing, his breath hot on her face as he jerked her forward then slammed her back again with his question.

Even with her head spinning she could feel her magic begin welling up inside of her.  Whatever this thing was, no matter that it wore Cullen’s face, it was not him and she wouldn’t simply let it keep abusing her.

She focused a spell in her mind, and just as she started to release it she saw realization cross his face.  He lifted his hand to grip her neck, the fingers biting in too tight even as he purged the magic from her.

The spell fell away, useless as ash, as her mana drained from her, and it continued to drain until she felt her knees buckle and only his hand was keeping her from falling into a heap on the floor.  He kept his grip firm on her throat as he slammed her head back again.  “Do you take me for a fool, demon?  Do you think they would let you near someone who could not control you?  Try such a thing again and I’ll kill you.”  His words dripped venom and she half thought that he might kill her anyway since his hand was still hard around her throat and sparks had begun to dance in front of her eyes.

Finally, blessedly, he pulled away, seeming to take enjoyment in the way she sucked in air and coughed when it was too much before his grasp moving to her shackles and giving a tug.  “Come with me.”

It wasn’t a request and she was dragged after him, bare feet tripping and stumbling over broken stone and gravel as he pulled her out into the day, the green of the breach made a sickening light in the sky and she barely had time to register the sneering faces around her before he was shoving her into another building and darkness.  He threw her towards a table and she over balanced, her knees hitting hard against the ground as her chest rammed into the sharp edge of wood.

A blurry gaze around the room revealed the stony expressions of Cassandra and Leliana as they stared at her before turning to Cullen.

“She says she knows nothing.”

Cassandra glared down at her a moment before placing a hand to her shoulder.  Pain radiated from her touch, lighting up under her skin and pulsing to every part of her body.  She tried to scream at the feeling of it but her throat was still aching and tight and the sound came out only as a depressingly hoarse rasp.

It seemed to go on forever, and her muscles began to seize from the ache of trying to strain away from the touch only to be held within it by Cullen’s firm grip on the back of her shirt.  Finally, it stopped and she was flung back towards the table, landing in a half sprawl over its surface.

“Tell me what happened or I will do it again.”

She tried to reply, she did, the words clawing desperately at her tongue in an attempt to be said, but all that came out was a pained groan that was soaked up by the wood her face was pressed into.

Real or not, she just wanted it to end.

She waited as the others murmured around her, her fingers digging uselessly into the steel of her shackles in some vain attempt to free herself.  Eventually her head was jerked back by a hard hand fisting into her hair.  Somewhere in her mind she registered that it belonged to Cullen, even like this she would know his hands anywhere.

Leliana appeared before her, the disgust clear on her face as they studied each other.  “If she won’t talk we have no use for her.  I say we cut off her hand and give it to Solas to do something with.  After that we can dispose of her.”  A sneer appeared even as Nell felt her own eyes widen.  “I’m sure the Chantry will be happy to be free of dealing with her.”

Cassandra made a disgusted noise and waved for Cullen to shove Nell against the table again.  “Solas, I already don’t like that we have one knife eared apostate to deal with.  I will be glad to get rid of a second one.”

The implication took a moment to sink in, but when it did Nell began to struggle against the man behind her, the beginning resurgence of magic swirling inside of her.  She had wanted it to end, but not like this, not to things wearing the faces of people she cared for.

Fear was a suddenly real thing as Cullen drained her again and Cassandra used the center bar of the shackles to pin her arms to the table.

She couldn’t fight it, there was no strength in her left, and all she could do was scrap her fingernails at the table until they and her skin broke and left red slashes on the wood.  Words kept trying to come out, jumbled things that made no sense even to her as she said them.

Kill her, fine, but change, please, please change the form before it happened.

Tears filled her already blurry eyes but she saw the flash of the knife that Leliana wielded above her and she tried to scream again.

And suddenly she was being ripped away, hands gripping and pulling at her until she was laying on her stomach gasping for breath.

She blinked at the green tinged world around her before turning her face to the ground and retching.  She pushed with trembling limbs until she was on her hands and knees, eyes and nose stinging as black water poured out of her lungs, each attempted breath bringing more and more, the strange flow of it dissipating into smoke as it hit the ground, until there was nothing left and she could only cough and dry heave.

A hand fell on her shoulder and she flinched away from it, her body curling protectively into itself as she shouted hoarsely at whoever might hear.

_“Don’t touch me!”_

She could feel them around her and she took her time in settling back onto her haunches before she focused on the two directly in front of her.

Dorian and Cassandra.

She thought she might want to throw herself at them, weeping and done with everything, but at the same time she wanted to be as far away from every other living soul as she could get.

“You fell into the water,” Dorian stated matter of factly, his voice blessedly even and emotionless.  She nodded, the memories coming back to her now of their fall into the fade and their trek to get out of it.  They had been skirting the edge of an ocean and she had slipped.

“Thank you for pulling me out.”  The words hurt to say and she could still feel the sting of her busted lip as she spoke.  Dorian nodded in response, but Cassandra merely stared at her, a look of utter sickness clear on her face.

Nell wondered how much they might have been able to see when they reached in after her.

Forcing herself to move, she reached out a shaking hand to brush halfheartedly against the Seeker’s.  “It wasn’t you.”

Cassandra looked away, her face clouding a moment before she gave a jerky nod and made to stand.

Dorian helped Nell, steadying her only long enough for her to find her feet and take back her staff.  She could still feel the burning in her veins from Cassandra’s spell, could still feel the utter emptiness of Cullen’s draining, but she could also feel her magic, whole and warm inside of her and she forced herself to focus on it.

She tried to block the dream from her mind, because she knew that was what it was, and for a moment she desperately wished that Cullen was there.  She wanted to see his face,  _his face_ , not that of a demon wearing him.  She wanted to see the way his lips quirked to the side, and his eyes darkened just before he kissed her.  She wanted, childishly, to feel him run his hand through her hair, his touch gentle before slipping down to twine their fingers together.

It was those thoughts that had her fear slowly turning to anger.  How dare he?   _How dare he?_   How dare that… that thing try and take those that were important to her and twist them into something wrong, and dark, and evil.  How dare it try to replace her memories with something else?

She began shaking again, but it had nothing to do with fear.

For the first time in her memory she lost her tight reign of control over her powers and felt as fire poured out of her hands, bathing the skin of them in flames and setting her staff into a blazing torch.  The suddenness of it had everyone stepping back. 

Her thoughts swirled darker as the heat increased and she had to check the urge to simply scream and scream until all the anger and fire were gone.  That wasn’t an option, and she knew that.  Somewhere behind her she heard Hawke’s voice, low, and calm, and so controlled one would think that she was well used to seeing mages battle for control.  Knowing her story, she probably was.

“What’s the plan now, Inquisitor?”

Focus, she needed to focus.  She took a breath and then another, letting the fire die down to mere flickers at her fingers.  After a quick sweep of the group she felt her lips settle into a think line as she looked up and towards the giant rift in the sky.

“We go kill a fucking demon.”


End file.
